Candles arn't so bad....


I felt depressed
So I bought a purple dildo
And a stripy duvet set
I felt so troubled
About my rising debt

I felt slightly pissed off
That the lecky man
Was going to turn off my juice
Can’t believe the trouble I’m in
I turned my duvet set into a noose

I hung my duvet noose
Over a cottage beam
What a stylish way to go
But as I stood on my Ikea Evert stool
The bloody ceiling was too low

Pulled my Soya ice-cream
Out the leaking freezer
And I lay in my low ceiling room
Wished I hadn’t chucked my cutlery out
So I used my dildo as a spoon